A New Year

It's a new year, 2014 we are happy you're here. Gracie is six and a half months and the most adorable thing I have ever seen. I know, I know your kid is the most adorable thing you've ever seen. She is now getting into the crawling position like a champ but once there it's all deer in the head lights staring at me, like "what now mom?" I'll be honest, I'm not ready for all the responsibility that a "crawler" holds. Number 1. I am taking 16 credit hours in school 2. Our apartment is far from baby proof, like it has baby hazard every where you turn 3. Crawling means she needs me a little less and I'm not ready for that. Every living person that has kids will say to you "Enjoy it, they grow way to fast" and as a new, tired mom you smile and think "If I had a dollar for every time someone told me that, I would literally be rich" But here is the deal, as annoying as they are, they are a million trillion fafillion percent right. I never thought I'd see the day I'd but Gracie in the sitting up position and she would be sitting there, by herself. I never thought that I would see her gleam with joy because she realizes I walked out of the room for 30 seconds but returned with a big smile on my face.

I also never realized how different (hard) having a baby would make my life. No class, no person, no nothing can tell you how your life will be with a baby. There are no more "fast" grocery shopping trips; correction fast is no longer in your vocabulary. I can not count how many times we are late for school and we are putting Gracie in her carseat and just like that the smell hits you. Then just like that you are cleaning poop off everything. You are changing her clothes (sometimes your own clothes) and praying it doesn't happen before you have to leave again. Suddenly your friends that don't have babies are people you see at wrestling duals and people that do have babies... Well you never see them because they are also cleaning poop up and never leaving their house cause it's to dang hard.

But I also didn't realize how beautiful and wonderful being a mother would be. You see this beautiful, poopie, miraculous baby sitting on the floor in front of you. She has your eyes and your husbands smile. She knows exactly who you are and what you mean to her. When she cries she cries for you, when she smiles she smiles for you. My day is dramatic and happy; it's like one of those awful depressing, yet happy love movies that everyone pretends like they hate but watches twice a week when no one is home. My life is one of those movies and I love it. I truly love it. I hope that  I get to watch this movie over and over and over again for the rest of my life.